Life After Mary Kay: Living with Purpose
Written by Rachel
On the discussion board last week, our friend Woodchuck77 told us:
I got a message from a so-called "friend" saying:
"Most people out there have no goals or dreams. Mary Kay teaches us to have goals and find our purpose. Now that you are out, what purpose do you feel you have?
Seriously? Most people have no goals or dreams? What nonsense! I’ve spent a lot of time talking to people about their goals and dreams in the last few months, and one thing I’ve learned is that most of us, even those who thought they didn’t, do have dreams. What’s more, many of us are living them. Dreams don’t always have to be spectacular or unusual. They don’t have to be perfect. Suppose your dream is to have a nice family. Or to live your life honestly – be what you are, and not what others expect. Those are great dreams! But the statement made by Woodchuck’s “friend” is designed to make you feel like your goals and dreams aren’t good enough. Don’t be fooled into thinking you have no dream because yours is ordinary, or because your life is imperfect. Mary Kay does seem to promise perfection. But guess what? Everybody’s life is imperfect. And seriously, what’s so extraordinary about selling make-up?
Certainly some of us join, and absolutely leave, Mary Kay without having our goals or dreams fulfilled. But if anyone thinks we can’t achieve important goals after Mary Kay, they should talk to Tracy, or me, or SuzyQ, or bubbles8990, or getdapinkouttahere, or ttp… well, the list goes on and on. We’ve started businesses, found our dream jobs, finished college, spent more time with our families, tried things we’d always wanted to but never dared. You name the dream; chances are someone on PT has lived it.
And here’s the thing: The kaybots would have you believe that Mary Kay is the only way to your dreams. But our experience tells us that people have their dreams warped and changed until they lose their meaning while in Mary Kay. And when people realize this, and finally get out… well, sometimes we feel pretty lost. We don’t remember what our dreams even were, or we feel it’s too late, and they’re lost to us. And maybe those old dreams are. Maybe we need to come up with some new goals and dreams. For some of us, it’s a very difficult transition. And that can make us susceptible to statements like the one Woodchuck’s “friend” made.
So what do we do when we’ve lost our dream – if the thing we really want seems to big too handle, or if we simply don’t know what we want? Well, this could be (is and will be) the topic for many articles. Today I’ll just start with this: Start small. If you have a big dream, think of small manageable step you can start on now. If not, let’s come up with anything you want to improve in your life. We all have something. Brainstorm now, and come up with that little first step. If you can’t think of a little step, let us help you. Looking for help is a great first step.
And for those of you who aren’t floundering, what purpose do you have in your life, now that you’re out? It’s a good question!
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How sad that Mary Kay herself had a dream at 40 to have her own company. I remember reading about her knowing her dead husband had set up a mlm business with the phoney name dual marketing. Too late to start over she had her young son help out. In no time MK knew that many of her directors were greedy and exploiting others. She chastised at least one of those early NSD’s right on stage at seminar for ruining the company. That narcissistic NSD was recruiting hundreds of women putting them in debt and moving on. Those same NSD’s built and lost units for decades. Their focus was on greed & money, not on the harming of many women. Maybe in 1960 being a sales woman at parties worked for Mary Kay and her first 10 directors. Even then though MK encouraged conning women with manipulation. For decades Mary Kay was a workaholic focused on money. I’m sure MK herself thought she was helping women. The reality was that like other sales companies MK exploited their sales force and their customers. The fact that MK did not care about our husbands showed just how money was her priority. Her legacy was a company that ruined the lives of many women. I doubt that she, her children, grandchildren & staff were all that close in the end either. Having a workaholic mom/grandma could not have been fun. Having someone stuck in a 1960’s mlm format simply meant thousands of women being exploited. Many of us finally woke up to the how phoney all of MK was. We realized the inferior over priced company & products. We went on to real dreams and well paid jobs with benefits. Jobs where we didn’t go into debt, lie to our husbands (as MK herself encouraged) and real jobs with real accolades. In addition we went on to do real charity work helping others. I also have had many awesome holidays where I didn’t have to focus on the phoniness of MK. Real dreams do come true including having a loving husband, awesome children and a great home. My children still cringe at the mention of MK. I am mostly ashamed that such a mlm cult conned me using Christian values they never adhered to.
If you want the truth, look at what she did and not what she said.
Mary Kay publicly chastised her NSD. Aaawwww.
It was all just for show. If Mary Kay really meant what she said she’d have railroaded the woman out of the company. She didn’t, because that NSD was a cash co, which meant more to her than anything else.
correction “not on the helping of other women”