1. Leftovers from their previous gig as Mermaids at Sea World.

2. Trophies

3. Ariel called. She wants her sea legs back.

4. And the winner of the Gaudiest Bridesmaid Dress is…… IT’S A TIE!!!!!!!!!!!

5. Reminds me of Mae West…still trying to pull off her signature look at age 80…just…no.

6. I like Gillian’s hair. But from the bangs down, she looks like a reject showgirl from the Luxor in Vegas.

   • Isn’t she a couple years late with that haircut?

     • Yes, but it is a huge improvement over her half side bun twist. But when has Mary Kay or any of the minions ever been on trend? I’m just glad she didn’t get the Kate Gosselin mullet.

       • Kim McClure is rocking the Kate Gosselin cut. Blech!

         https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/p403x403/10509509_10204277370875327_769206068762309266_n.jpg?oh=01e67b60805657168463f9f6a6db4c0a&oe=544FE457&__gda__=1412671890_4bce10fe17635f0318176a354813f9de

         • Kim has some serious sun damage on her chest. Guess the MK products don’t work.

           • Oh they “might” work but some women never think to cover that area as they get older. LOL

         • Kim looks like Frankenstein with a bad wig and the above look like well dressed trannies

           1

7. What’s with the crotch tassel?

   • Crotch tassel. Bwahahaha!
     It’s Kleenex in case she, um, oh wait. Never mind 😉

     • HA! I snorted! If this is what a “professional business woman” looks like, I’ll keep my boots, jeans and the occasional alpaca spit thank you very much.

   • Can she make it spin? And reverse directions?

   • I remember my grandmas always keeping Kleenex in their sweater sleeves, maybe this is the new way to keep Kleenex handy and matching at the same time.

8. The uglier my dress is, the less likely they are to notice how much crap is caked on my face. Please don’t notice my wrinkles, please don’t notice my wrinkles!

9. Ladies, we are all missing the point here. The real question is “Which is heavier? My face makeup or my dress?”

   • I’m guessing the makeup! it looks like she put all her samples on her face!

10. Would you like sprinkles with that?

11. Where did Gillian find a “Brunhilde the Valkyrie warrior” chestplate? In a Halloween costume shop?

    I can see her now strutting across the stage.
    (Cue Wagner’s Ride of the Valkyries.)
    DUM DA-DA DAAAHHH DUM
    DUM DA-DA DAAAHHH DUM
    DUM DA-DA DAAAHHH DUM
    DUM DA-DA DAAA!

12. OMG!!! I cannot believe that anyone in their right mind would be caught dead in either of these gowns! No pun intended with “caught”, as they do appear to be mermaids!!!

13. Las Vegas called and wants it’s dresses…oh no…wait. Never mind!

    I personally know a few drag queens who could give these ladies a few lessons in class and style. This is hideous!

14. Those dresses are so gaudy that they should be wearing only simple jewelry. These ladies look like they are playing dress-up with the curtains from a Victorian-era bordello.

    • “I saw it in the window and just had to have it”. Carol Burnett did it better! LOL

15. Outside the 4th St. Burlie-Q, two of the stars of the show getting ready to strut their stuff and shed some sequins for their adoring fans … the exotic dancers BoomBoom LaTitz and Tammy Tawdry.

    Are they REALLY blonde? Buy a ticket and find out!

    • Lazy for the win!!! Almost asphyxiated on my bagel!!

    • Amazeballs. You win 14 internets.

16. I have to laugh when I think of all the consultants and sales directors who fell all over themselves to tell these two how AMAAAAAZZZZZZING their dresses were. LIES!

    • Oh, they weren’t lying. They just weren’t defining AMAZING the same way the dress wearers imagined they were. 😀

    • Remember how they are taught to say a crappy day was”UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!!” Same concept in regards to commenting the dresses. They say “THAT DRESS IS A-MA-ZING!!!!” But what they really mean is, “That dress is a-ma-zingly horrible!”

17. “I warm chatted the girl at goodwill and she told me this dress was SOO in this season!!” ….. or maybe they need to check the side effects of those second rate cosmetics cause that looks like an acid trip.

18. Neither Woman Looks Good.

    PS… It is inappropriate to wear a dress with a train unless… You are a Bride or you are going to be formally presented to the Queen (or royalty)

19. The top of the Mary Kay world reminds me of those Nigerians that create scams for preying on the retirement funds of old people with Alzheimer’s Disease.

20. Rent the Runway y’all! No really! Google it haha

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