Spiritual Spin in Mary Kay
Written by SuzyQ
This was the hardest part for me. I remember running into a director at a gas station after my first seminar in 1998. I asked her “I don’t get this part of making God my business partner.” She said “You will.” At that seminar I heard Cindy Williams say “God does not call the equipped, He equips the called.” I was stunned. Born and raised as Episcopalian, I had never heard God’s name evoked in any business opportunity before, and I was at a loss for words.
Fast forward a few years and I was a member of a semi-elite Bible Studies group for directors only. This involvement called for me to drive 100 miles round trip to breathe the same air as other directors who were more worthy than me. I remember the first time we prayed for more red jackets and more production. Another stunning moment. The leader of the group was a soon to be NSD and we were all in awe. She referred to women like me as “baby Christians.” I knew I was lacking but was unclear where my growth needed to be focused.
We read all the books (Rick Warren, Joel Osteen, whoever wrote The Prayer of Jabez) the list goes on and on. Whatever the “Christian” book of the moment was, we bought it and read it. My business did not grow. I was not successful…
I remember going to church and asking my Priest for a moment after the service. I told him that I had been learning that my goals are not big enough, my deserve level isn’t high enough, and I asked him if I had been saved. I was in tears and he held my hands in his and suggested that maybe I try a different Bible study group. He also assured me that we had the “saved” thing covered when I was baptized as an infant.
My senior director was fond of saying that when she died, she was going to have to face Mary Kay and God, in that order. She was a lapsed Catholic and I always thought that was kind of hinky, but then again, when we got the call from MK Corporate that MK had died, I cried, so there you go. The point is that Mary Kay became entangled with God in my head and it was devastating.
I am not a stupid woman. I have advanced degrees. (That would be plural.) I can’t believe I fell for this shit. It got to the point in my head that if I quit MK, I was also quitting God. Can you take a moment and breathe and think about how powerful this thinking was for me? I was letting “the enemy” steal my dreams; I was letting negativity into my life. The response from my sister directors when I mentioned reading MK Sucks (what Pink Truth was called in the very beginning) was devastating. I was quickly identified as the person to avoid and to pray for because I was letting Satan into my head. I was doubting. I was not working enough, I was not believing enough.
I quit after telling my unit to read Pink Truth, make their own decisions, and decide what was best for them. I returned my inventory and surprised my senior with a huge hit in June the year I quit. Rumor has it she was really pissed. We have that in common.
I have been out of Mary Kay for so long, but I am still amazed at the women who fall for this crap. That’s what it is, it’s crap. The money is in recruiting and that is the entire focus. The product line is changed to make sure consultants order and the directors get their cut. I am appalled at the NSDs who quote scripture out of context as a way to justify their behavior. This twisting of “religion” and “God” and “spirituality” is morally corrupt and emotionally damaging.
To put the period on my sentences here… the woman who led my super special Bible study sessions did in fact become NSD. She did her 5 years and quit. I wonder how she sleeps at night. How do any of the “leaders” in MK sleep at night?
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My senior director was fond of saying that when she died, she was going to have to face Mary Kay and God, in that order.
I’m not religious but this is blatant idolatry, IMHO. And leads back to me thinking that if a supernatural being was involved in Mary Kay Wagner Rogers Eckman Weaver Louis Miller Hallenbeck Ash’s company, it’s not God, it’s probably Crowley.
I think a demon had a hand in designing that tacky-ass cross in the picture as a way of turning people off of wearing religious symbols. Maybe Hastur or Ligur, working on the designer’s mind until they snapped.
I certainly don’t think you’re stupid, and the same goes for those who get sucked into an MLM >ONCE< (I do kind of lose respect for repeat offenders who go from MLM to MLM expecting something different.) Because their tactics don't target your brain, they target your heart. I've read the recruiting scripts and the whole point is to needle away at the victim until you find that chink in her armor. In your case, it sounds like a religious woman who wanted to grow in her spirituality and connection to God with the help of some like-minded women.
However, instead of companions on your journey you got mugged and gaslit by a gang of bandits whose god is Mary Kay Wagner Rogers Eckman Weaver Louis Miller Hallenbeck Ash and whose scripture is Love Checks and recruitment scripts.
Major kudos to your priest, too. It's amazing how far a little quiet kindness can go.
(And well done for returning your inventory in June. I hope your director learned a little lesson about reaping what she'd sown, but she probably didn't.)
Popinki, you hit the nail right on the head! “I’ve read the recruiting scripts and the whole point is to needle away at the victim until you find that chink in her armor.”
That is the MO for recruitment in all MLMs. Consultants are encouraged to help people ‘find their why’ and hone in on that . Everyone has a want/need. More money, deeper friendships, a more fulfilling job or career, a more reliable car, stronger faith in God, desire for travel, sense of belonging…and guess what? The Mary Kay (Amway, Melaleuca, It Works, LuLaRoe, Avon, Pampered Chef, Color Street, Rodan & Fields, Plexus, Scentsy, Magnetude Jewelry, Grace & Heart, Beachbody, etc.) ‘opportunity’ ticks off all of those boxes! Just figure what’s lacking in their life and describe how they can fill the hole just by signing up!
The spiritual manipulation in MK and other MLMs is horrid and devastating. My faith and spirituality were severely damaged by MK and those I was around. I *thought* those women were women of great faith. I *thought* reading some of these books would help me with my business AND my spiritual path. (I couldn’t read these books — it was so contradictory to what I knew were Biblical truths. I later put the stack of books through a wood chipper.) My spiritual journey post-MK took years of healing.
If you aren’t a Christian, you get brow-beaten into conforming to the Church of Mary Kay Wagner Rogers Eckman Weaver Louis Miller Hallenbeck Ash. You are told that something is wrong with you, that your faith is misplaced. No, it’s not. My faith is my faith. When I pointed out that if God was your copilot, you were in the wrong seat, folks had their gasts flabbered.
SuzyQ, you are not stupid. MLMs like Mary Kay have spent decades honing their message and marketing approach to snare even the well educated. The pitch is seductive…pushing all the right buttons for folks looking for something “more” or “better” in their lives.
Sadly, it’s all a scam, which you discovered. What they claim as “possible” is highly improbable for 99% of participants. The biggest lie of all is the relationship between the MLM and the rep. MLMs like Mary Kay do not see their reps as business owners. They seem them as customers tricked into recruiting even more customers, ad infinitum.
All of the meetings, seminar, marketing messages, pep talks, sales pitches, awards, trinkets, bonuses…they are all in place to distract you from the sad reality in MLM: you are the customer.
“others were more worthy than me.”
“I knew I was lacking”
“I was not successful”
“I had been learning that my goals are not big enough, my deserve level isn’t high enough”
Thank you for your transparency, SuzyQ. I am struggling for words for this today (I know, that shocks all of you!) But, frankly, it just completely pisses me off that the cult tactics of Mary Kay convince otherwise smart, capable, successful women that it’s their lack, their negativity, their fault that they’re not successful at this business. From an outsider’s perspective, it’s clear that the problem is in the business model itself, not with anyone attempting to operate within it. But from the inside, from deep in the opacity of the pink fog, it feels like everyone else is worthy, successful, beautiful, charming, rich and positive. And you’re the only one who’s struggling.
That is 100% false, and I think that’s the most important piece that Pink Truth brings to the table. Consultants and directors, you’re not alone. You’re not a negative nelly, you’re not failing because you’re not working hard enough or not thinking big enough. You’re trapped in a system that is victimizing you and taking advantage of your finances to thrive. Stop it! Get out!
NO NO NO NO NO You are not STUPID. Stupid, to me, is having learned a lesson I then repeat the incorrect behavior while knowing better. To become an enlightened person you MUST have an open mind, but that is dangerous when the wrong influences surround a person and the person doesn’t have the discernment available to identify the danger. BUT THAT DOESN’T MAKE YOU STUPID.
In any event, what bothers me the most is that the NSD who is a spiritually abusive person isn’t named. Yes, I believe strongly in name and shame because protecting the vile perpetrators allow them to continue in freedom to harm and ruin lives.
So I will say please name this person but I also know the fear of incurring the wrath of the sociopath so I sure understand if you don’t. But I AM FREAKING GLAD YOU ARE FREE OF HER xoxoxoxoxoxo
My SD was Jewish and didn’t bring religion into our meetings.
While I certainly pray for God’s help in my work, it’s always about Him giving me wisdom and to exhibit the fruit of the Spirit in my dealings with colleagues and students. I often pray for my students – that they understand the content, that they are able to create a work/school/life balance, etc. I’ve never prayed for God to send more students to our program. Honestly, until today, I never even thought to do so. I guess I’ve thought that it’s up to God to inspire people as to their future career. I certainly think our program is an excellent choice, but it’s not always the right option for an individual for a variety of reasons.
For those of us who are not Christian, we were not treated all that kindly by many in MK. I avoided all kinds of religious connotations within my unit, minus a mealtime blessing (at the request of many unit members). I had a unit member who was an atheist, and she was absolutely livid at the one and only Seminar she attended since everyone and anyone tried to proselytize to her.
Yep. I was a Pink Cadillac Director, believed every word I was hearing, and my good Lord “showed” me the business model and how the only winner was the company. I worked endlessly. Crashed. Had a baby. Could not do it. That was 40 years ago. Thank you thank you Lord. Went back to school, got my advanced degrees, worked to make my retirement sound, and did just that. I will say the my Mary Kay experience helped me to become a successful employee and a hard worker. “All things work together for those who love the Lord”. Today I am a proud Catholic.