Burn Those Bridges!
Written by SuzyQ
Burn those bridges, ladies! It’s the right thing to do! Trust me!
Oh my. Did anyone else hear those words in Mary Kay? Of course you did, especially if you became one of the TOP TWO PERCENT IN THE ENTIRE WORLD (that would be a director, of course), or at least in the company. I wish I had a nickel for every time I heard “Mary Kay doesn’t like her directors to work. It makes it look as though you don’t trust the company or the position of director.”
How many times did we hear directors say they were so excited to leave their J.O.B.S. so they could stop devoting all of that time working for someone else, and instead use that time to build their own futures? How many other times were we told lies? For example:
- Can you give yourself a raise whenever you want?
- Can you promote yourself at work?
- Can you take time off whenever you please?
- If you decide that you want Fridays off, can you take Fridays off?
- Do you have to call in sick to someone? Have you ever needed a note from the doctor?
- Your health insurance is not a benefit, do you know they are taking it out of your salary?
- Are you being paid what you are worth, or what the “job” is worth?
- Do you get recognition at work?
- Can a (wo)man be loyal to two masters?
- Have you taken God as your business partner?
- Do you trust that God has laid His plan for success on your heart?
- Isn’t it fun to make money by playing with make-up and talking on the phone?
So, directors, remember those first few weeks after DIT? Thinking you had made it, you had really made it! You had some debt with the fake consultants and all, but everybody else did, too. In my DIT class, Tom Whatley laughed and told us we needed to replace the “mirror foggers” and get right back into DIQ. We laughed, too.
We bought all the business tools and bling we were given the opportunity to buy, and learned quickly that director expenses were incredibly high. We didn’t want to look cheap though and we knew we had to sell the director sizzle. We also knew that business debt is good and personal debt was bad, and it would all add funny stuff to the I story when we debuted as NSDs. The road map was clear, all we had to do was follow.
We are told even more now—now that we are directors—that Mary Kay didn’t like her directors to work. Many of us have jobs that are not particularly wonderful—positive recognition may be missing, hours may be funky, pay may not be as much as we would like, coworkers may not appreciate us trying to recruit them, bosses may not understand that we need to be on the phone during our lunch breaks, or that we need time off to attend a retreat or event or function, and our senior directors just sigh when we express our frustration… it feels like we are trying to work two full-time jobs. One of them seems to have a dead-end and the other has unlimited potential. They understand, our seniors, and they say again “Mary Kay doesn’t like her directors to work, what are you waiting for?”
So, we quit our day jobs. We have been slowly and completely been absorbed into the pink fog. We know we are winners! We are directors! We drive free cars! We are business women! We are Godly women, and MK is our mission field! We are in the Top 2% of the Company! I remember feeling terrified and empowered when I quit. My daughter had a more practical point… I remember her words as though it was yesterday… “Way to go Mom, now we will be on the street.” I responded “We will look so pretty someone will rescue us.”
When we are directors in MK there is no extra money for continuing education and licensure requirements and those of us with professional credentials really have no choice but to let them expire. We are not supposed to work, so we can’t get practice hours, and we can’t afford the additional expense of continuing education hours anyway. We burn our bridges. We are on our own. But, our MK business will save us if we bee-lieve enough and work hard.
Burning those bridges. The bridges need to be burned so that all of our effort and energy is focused on MK, and not those silly credentials that pull our attention away from the task of building our units. If we have something professional to “fall back on” we will not invest what is necessary–emotionally, spiritually or financially– into our MK business. When MK becomes our sole source of income, MK logic tells us we will be successful, if we don’t burn the bridges, we are not the kind of director MK wants us to be.
Except what boss or professional has EVER encouraged you to lose the license you worked so hard to get? What business owner has ever suggested that you need to let that certification go so you’d be more committed to their company? Who in their right mind encourages you to burn a bridge when you never know when you may need another professional opportunity? NONE. Except Mary Kay. Real professionals know the value of licenses and certifications even if you’re not currently utilizing them. Real professionals know that someday a job opportunity might come your way unexpectedly, and you might just need that license. But not in Mary Kay. They want you to give up everything you worked so hard for that you will be forced to stay in MK. Even if you want or need to go back to your old profession, without that license or certification, you’ll have a hard time doing so.
So many other PT’ers, including me, have written about specific issues related to directorship and why it is so hard, I won’t go through it here again. What I do want to address again though, is the fact that many of us were incredibly successful and good at what we did at our J.O.B.S., and in our professions, that it was humiliating and impossible to understand how we could fail so badly at something that supposedly required nothing more than “squirting and reading.”
Burning those bridges… it’s too late for many of us, but lurkers? Lurkers, please listen. DO NOT burn your bridges. Maintain your certifications and credentials. Keep your options alive. Do whatever it takes to keep those bridges open. MK will not work, read a little more on this site if you still have doubts about us “lazy loosers.” Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I had to spend over $1300 (money from my J.O.B.) and a year of my life to regain one of my licenses. I once again have professional licensure… it’s a good thing.
Very, very true.
This is so important, Suzy! Especially in today’s job climate, job security is NOT in any company. It’s in an individual–their skills, their relationships/network, their own personal brand. This is especially true for MLMs like Mary Kay. And, as Suzy beautifully points out, no other career requires that you give up your unrelated professional qualifications to stay employed. Ok, well, maybe not NONE, but none that are credible and have your best interest at heart.
Lurkers, if you have any doubts, look up the multitude of companies that operate like MK that have either gone out of business, sold to a third party company, or switched their model away from recruiting. Current directors, if MK ever did what BODi did, would you be able to pay your bills as an “affiliate” salesperson? Better question, can you pay your bills now? Does directorship pay you what you’re worth?
I’ll repeat what I often say here to the lurkers and those that just “stumbled” upon us. None of us at PT have any stake in YOUR success or failure. We do not profit from you quitting MK. We don’t lose anything if you stay in. The same cannot be said of your upline or corporate. Take the advice of someone who has no stake in your decision over the person who profits off your misery.
“None of us at PT have any stake in YOUR success or failure. We do not profit from you quitting MK. We don’t lose anything if you stay in.”
Well worth repeating. No one here is trying to MAKE you do anything. They’re providing you with data you can use to make an informed decision for yourself.
When you apply for a regular job, you see the workplace. You have interviews with higher-ups. You meet the people you’d be working with. Plus, you can read Glassdoor or Yelp or whatever reviews of the place and what it’s like to work there, You can ask questions about the culture, the compensation, the dress code. They’re assessing you, yes, but you’re also assessing THEM to see if it’s the kind of place you’d like to work at.
The MK recruitment tornado cuts you off from the second half of that equation so you don’t find out about the negatives until you’re already in over your head and no one will help you because no negativity allowed.
I’d like to add some real questions to the bullet list SuzyQ provided:
– Did you know it is impossible in Mary Kay to create a downline that is profitable as a whole?
– If you knew that your personal gains depend on the losses in your own downline, would you continue with Mary Kay anyway?
– How much personal profit will it take to allow you to look away from all the financial harm being done to members of your own downline?
– Does it bother you to know that in traditional businesses (but not MLM) it is possible for everyone in the business, including the salesforce, to make positive money?
– Does it bother you to know that MLMs can’t survive without significant aggregate losses in their own sales force…in every downline?
– Does it bother you to know MLM companies don’t view their salespeople as business owners or even as distributors, but as customers?
MLMers must make a choice: Ignore or embrace the realities of MLM, with all the financial, reputational and relational damage done in one’s own downline.
Every lurker should also apply each of those excellent questions to their own recruiter. How was the recruiter viewing you as their new downline? I.e., you were the sitting duck for them, and they were doing everything in that list of questions TO YOU.
One more question: Are you prepared to do the same to others? (Data Junkie’s original context.)
MLM is so gross.
Outstanding questions Data Junkie! Thank you for this addition!
Another brilliant post, Suzy! I remember quitting my well-paying J.O.B. thinking that I was on my way to making the truly big money in Mary Kay. A short few months later, I was missing the blessings of a 9-5 with a guaranteed income. As directors we were pressured into making MK our only source of income, so it would have been inconceivable for me to get my old job back or apply for another. What could I do except get back on that hamster wheel, and work twice as hard as I ever had? Thank God I didn’t have any licenses or credentials to lose like you did, Suzy. I am so proud of you that you picked yourself back up and rose even higher post-pink!