This was a comment on one of our blog entries, from a sales director who has been with Mary Kay for 13 years. This is what it feels like when you’re no longer willing to load up women with inventory and you’re not a “top” director anymore.

Been lurking here for several months – – reading daily confirming much of what I have known in my heart to be true for some time and going through the process of coming to grips with all of it. I’ve invested almost 13 years of my life in MK ~ 11+ as a SD, driven everything from the Grand Ams to the Pink Caddies (3 of them), unit club +++ most years, top 10 in my NSD area most of my years as a SD, several offspring + MANY adopted offspring through the years, had been working towards N$D… however ~ I have had this gut wrenching feeling in my stomach for the past several years that would not go away.

At first I internalized the feelings and wondered if maybe I had just lost my passion – – I hung in there expecting that if I just stayed in the “flow” of event attendance, meetings, the rah-rah & pink bubble somehow the passion might be re-ignited – – – then the company fired RBD – – everything broke loose for me.

I have known for a long time that MK Corp. held the ultimate control over the N$D position (all positions for that matter) and that ultimately I discovered along the way that I was not actually building my OWN business, I was building a business for MKC. RBD getting fired REALLY opened my eyes to face things I knew inside, but didn’t want to admit to myself.

I was dumbfounded that N$D areas like Anne Newberry’s area were producing hundreds of millions of dollars in revenue for the company and she was ONLY making (at tops this past year ) 1 million in income off of that production. To me the ratio of 1 million in income to the production of say 100+ million for her area just disgusted me.

In my quiet pillow talk conversations with my husband over the years I would lament over my dismay that I wasn’t making the kind of money that I wanted to be making in MK (100,000+ a year AFTER expenses – my highest year after expenses was upwards of $55,000 take home pay). I would share with him that I wished there was a way to do MK and actually make money because there were many things I really enjoyed about the company – – or so I thought I enjoyed those things while I was brainwashed and immersed in the pink fog.

Little by little I found it harder and harder to maintain “pink thinking, talking, walking, etc…”  I stopped holding my unit meetings, events, awards nights, trainings, breakfasts, Red Jacket super star events, and thought my unit would soon die off.

I can honestly say that in my very active days of pink rah-rah I was a training fool. I would train until the cows came home every week with my whole group. At one point I was holding 3 unit meetings a week & two other supplemental events a week. My events always focused on training and presenting the product in a format that would feature product for sale. It helped that I am naturally gifted at sales in that people feel they can trust me and I was highly educated with the product and color cosmetic application techniques. My unit would watch me and we would work hands on along side of each other working with the product at every event.

This is the main factor I believe that my unit has not died off when I stopped “working” as a SD. The core group has continued to produce $5,000-$10,000 wholesale with very few new consultants coming in with inventory for almost 3 years now. My unit has hovered around the 50-60 member range for all this time.

So my check has continued to roll in each month somewhere between $1800-$3500 a month (unit commissions, team commissions, SSD commissions & car cash). Honestly, I have been shocked!!! Was the pay EVER equal to the hours of time I poured into my business – NO WAY!!!

Do I consider that amount an “executive income” – heck no!!! However, before you all spit at me or toss veggies my way – – I can say that this does in some way exhibit that if you “train”  a sales team (any team/any company/any product) to SELL they can/will sell if they are motivated to do so. My unit’s production is based on sales at this point. This amount of sales however has NOT been enough to produce unit club, a Cadillac, a decent income, star consultant status, winning any contests, being in my NSDs area top 10, any special recognition for stage or lunches – – so basically “sucking pond scum as a low life loser at the bottom of the scoreboard” existence in MK is about where I am now (sharing that from having been at the “top” for quite a long time – so I KNOW the difference).

This status currently has me pin holed in my NSD area as a “black sheep” and “pooh-poohed” by the directors that I used to share the stage with. After all, they can’t “afford” to hang out with a low life loser director that is not on the scoreboard. My “friends” that I used to share the stage with at the “top” have faded into the distance and don’t call or keep in touch much anymore. The social outcasting in MK is brutal.

The mental mind games of deception and shunning are nothing less than cult like. The feelings of shame and self contempt that originate out of the ‘lack of performance’ place are incredibly painful before you wake up to the reality of it all. I have all but dropped of my NSDs radar – not that I got any attention from her anyway – other than cheap and tacky prizes that you can get from the dollar store when I was a top producer in her area. Don’t let me forget to mentioned the ump-teen prizes that she left the price tag on so I KNOW they were from the dollar store – – insulting and embarrassing when the prizes go to your top producing team members at seminar and they know your NSD makes upwards of $400,000 a year in commissions – sickening! Talk about GREED and profiting off the backs of the bottom feeders.

My heart of hearts continued to believe in the HOPE that things might be different. The difference would be when “I” was an NSD I could do it “the right way” and be a better example for my people. Yet the heartbreak and DOUBT caused me to continue to question ~ years have passed and I have lingered in that place.

Then as I shared before, they fired RBD. I was dumbfounded and awakened all at the same moment. It was the beginning of the end of me. The following are the significant reasons why I am bringing my affiliation with Mk to a close:

1. It is a lie that you are in business for yourself. READ your agreement contract. MKC has ALL the control over YOU.

2. I have found that the income claims and lifestyle claims are exaggerated all the time.

3. Chargebacks are brutal and another way in which MKC controls your every dime of income.

4. MKC plays favorites.

5. The legal guidelines that are in the sales director agreement prevent you from following normal business practices.