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Currently a director - help
When I was first shared with about Mary Kay I remember telling my recruiter that I needed to research and the first thing she said to me was, “just don’t go on pink truth. It’s a bunch of lies.” And so I didn’t. I didn’t before I signed. I didn’t when things weren’t adding up. I didn’t when my sister DIQ backed out and warned me of what she had learned on here. I didn’t after I debuted and directorship wasn’t magical like it was promised to me. I didn’t when my upline encouraged me to stretch and finish car. I didn’t when I missed production 2 months in a row and the advice was always, ALWAYS “go find new.” “Talk to me after you’ve had a power start of 30 quality (aka wealthy) women.” 

But recently I did. And it’s confirmed a lot of things my intuition already knew. 
Here’s the thing: I actually have made pretty good money because I’m good at sales and I am an odd one out who actually likes selling thr skincare. 

But I’m tired of being a director yall. I’m tired of stressing of hitting minimums. I’m tired of being a pink hype girl to a new recruit who I’m afraid might not succeed and that will be on my hands. I’m tired of the number 30. I’m tired of events that are propaganda more than anything. I’m especially tired of bad theology. 

I feel stuck because I am very close to my recruiter and her upline who is currently working towards NSD and I am a piece of that puzzle. I know if I leave it’s “betrayal” and that sucks because I love them so much. I need help
Welcome to pink truth !!!

It would definitely not be a betrayal to step down. You should not have to be worried about someone else’s goals. If they need assistance they can always have a power start or two.

The way I look at it is - you’d never go to a job and clock in using someone else’s time card.
Oh Iwaspink - you are singing my song! Directorship is so exhausting and all-consuming. And it will never stop, even if/when your upline makes it to NSD.

You know in your heart you want to leave directorship and that it's the best thing for you. But you're worried about "betraying" your upline. Here's the thing: They do not care about your mental health. They do not care about your professional goals. They do not care about your life/work balance.

They care about your production. 

You have one life and you can't afford to squander it on a predatory company that is draining your soul. I know that you love the women you have been working with and it probably will hurt to break those ties. I truly hope you gather the courage to risk those friendships for the sake of the true relationships you will make once you are free from the recruiting-intensive mindset that directorship forces you to have.

I also was good at selling - selling is fun! And if that's what you're good at and where you find your happy place, you can leverage your Mary Kay experience in any number of legitimate sales positions that actually reward you for your efforts (and not for your ordering). I promise you will come out of this with your integrity intact, your true relationships strengthened and making a WHOLE lot more money for time invested! We're all pulling for you!

(I see where you DM'd me and I'm happy to talk further with you.)
11 years as a sales director, 5 career cars, 3 national court rings, 47 stars on my ladder. Which part of that is not working the business?
Sorry you got pulled into this. Happy you finally checked us out and are realizing the scam.

“If you leave it’s betrayal.”

They betrayed you from the very beginning and did it knowingly. They lied, even to the extent of warning you away from here because they were afraid you wouldn’t join and you’d miss out on this wonderful opportunity, but because they’d lose the commission they wanted to make off of you. They’ve used you to make money, and to make money off the women you recruited and your sales. Continued to lie when you realized things weren’t adding up by using well rehearsed manipulative responses to keep you in. Continued to lie when you saw that the reality of director wasn’t magical, by, your own admission, feeding you propaganda. Making you feel like it’s your fault, that you’re not working hard enough or doing it right, making you doubt yourself instead of the company and them. Making YOU feel guilty that they’re not reaching THEIR goals.

And worst of all, they’ve got you so fogged you still think they’re your friends, that they love you as you you love them, and are feeling guilty because they’ve made you feel like you’re personally responsible for them not achieving their goals.

They’re not your friends. They’ll drop you like you never existed, lie about and disparage you to their unit members, paint you as selfish and a lazy “looser” who just didn’t work hard enough. Your name will be dead to them. Why don’t they go find new if that’s what they need? Why don’t they do their own power start? Why don’t they go recruit wealthy women? (Which is a joke because they’ll recruit anyone that walks even if they’re not employed because they figure they can convince them to go into debt). Because instead of of them doing it, their game is to manipulate every one in their down line to do it for them.
My old director who was anywhere from top 5 to 15 in our division in the 9 years I was in had a banner every year NSD 2001, NSD 2002, NSD 2005, NSD, 2011. Still not there 20 years later. Gone from executive executive senior senior senior to only a few units under her. YOU will not be the reason for her failing to make NSD.

And if you stay in, you’re just helping them to manipulate and lie to other women about the mystical magic.

Get out, send it all back, get out of debt, tell your unit members why, give yourself grace, heal, cry, feel relief, feel wiped out, feel strong, work through it. You’re the reason we’re here.
(05-25-2023, 06:26 AM)Iwaspink Wrote: I feel stuck because I am very close to my recruiter and her upline who is currently working towards NSD and I am a piece of that puzzle. I know if I leave it’s “betrayal” and that sucks because I love them so much.

This is the special evil of MLMs  ... they use your personal and family relationships for their own profit. They turn your good traits into weapons to be used against you.

Her upline does not give a shit about you, just about getting to NSD, and keeping the right number of directors under her is all she's thinking about.
Everything is going according to the plan.  THEIR plan.

You said it yourself.   You are a piece of the puzzle, yet, you don't want to "betray" them because you "love them."   
"I feel stuck."  Sounds exactly like a cult!

"Bad theology"?  Don't be a part of it.  It reflects on you.  

You can:
  • Stay "stuck" in Mary Kay 
  • Continue to be miserable and stressed.  
  • Continue to be used by others and squeezed of your time, energy and money.  
  • Continue recruiting victims to help push a stranger to NSD status.  
  • And then CONTINUE to do all of the above to KEEP her at that level.

The decision is yours.  

Keep us informed.  Grouphug
Sell in secret to home-party hostesses and then recruit them.  THIS they call a 'business.' ~~Raisinberry
Please take on pinkpeace's wisdom. She's one of the good ones. And she was once in a very similar position.

I was a director, too. But I had the advantage of not having a close personal relationship with my upline. So that "betrayal" of my immediate MK "family" didn't sting quite as much. Not gonna lie--it REALLY sucked to lose a bunch of people I counted as friends. But the reality is that they were never really friends. Friendship doesn't have a dollar sign on it. I struggled quitting for a long time because I was also making decent money selling the product. I was an outlier, and I really struggled leading other women in MK because I just didn't understand why they couldn't sell like I could. I bought the company's lies hook line and sinker--if they weren't successful, it must be their fault. That logic was particularly damning when my success started to slip, little by little.

Stepping down from directorship is hard. Quitting Mary Kay is hard. Because, if you're anything like me, you've wrapped so much of your identity up in this company and the pink, glittery lies, that it's almost impossible to extricate yourself. And that's leaving aside the relationships you will likely lose. HOWEVER, the only regret that I have about stepping down from directorship and leaving Mary Kay is that I didn't do it sooner. I wish you the best on your journey through this decision. We'll be here for you as you work out what's best for you and your family.

My best advice is this: take some time. Breathe. Journal. Reconnect to the woman you were before MK, and especially before directorship. What are YOUR goals? What do you want from YOUR life? Do the best you can to divorce YOUR wants, needs and desires from what you've been told you SHOULD want. The right answer will come.
I too was good at selling and doing makeovers. So when I quit Mk and I became a makeup artist for Dior. If you live near a mall, consider contacting the account executive of a line you like and see if they might hire you. I made more money with Dior than I ever did with MK. The training and perks of free product way outshined MK.
Was an IBC for 8 years, not a "Lazy Looser"
Welcome to Pink Truth! My heart goes out to you. I echo the replies here, and I too have found support and courage from the stories shared. You will come out the other side of this stronger and better. Give yourself time to grieve, be angry and cry. Once you’ve gotten it all out you will have room in your heart and life for all of the good things that come from an MK free life. You’ll build great friendships and work somewhere that you can be proud of. You also have the opportunity to take any positives you learned in MK and apply them as you see fit. You are also an inspiration to the other people that have made their way to Pink Truth and are on the cusp of making the same great decision. You’re already making a positive impact outside of MK! I wish you all the best and thank you for sharing your story. Ok
The best thing you can do is take advantage of the buyback. Every month that passes, the amount you can return is reduced (provided if you have placed regular orders). Best thing I did was step down from directorship and send the inventory back.
It’s amazing how little they care about you , even when you are told the 90% is our security. And “leaving should be as graceful as entry”. Well , rumors spread about me ranging from an abusive husband to a drinking problem. Absolutely wild!

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